CHAPTER XVII: The Search for Paula
"Wakey-wakey, guys! Time to get up!"
Ness rolled over in his sleeping bag. "Just five more minutes, Paula..." He mumbled.
"No way, Ness. It's time to go!" She squatted next to him, shaking his shoulder. "Wake up, or I'll have to force you out of your sleepiness!"
"How?" He said drowsily. "No power on earth can drag me out of this sleeping bag right no--mmph!"
Jeff sat up, reaching for his glasses. Once he got them on, he looked at the "argument".
"Yeah. Ness!" He shouted. "That's the way!"
The stage was set somewhat like this: One young man, shocked and amazed, eyes bugging out of his head, sitting in a half sit-up position. Connected to him was a young woman, her lips almost fused to his, eyes closed, one hand clutching a wad of the front of his shirt, the other resting on the ground.
Ness swore he could feel her tongue in his mouth.
She pulled back, breathing heavily. "Well?"
"Okay," Ness panted. "Almost no force on earth..."
The Grand Department Store was huge. The doors, rather than being made of glass, were made of heavy oak. It was four stories tall, and blocked out the sun.
They went inside, and Ness withdrew some cash from the ATM.
"Where do you get so much cash, Ness?" Jeff asked.
"My dad supplies it whenever he has extra money," He shrugged, adjusting his baseball cap on his head. "Let's go."
They were there for almost an hour, buying different foods and snacks, and they outfitted themselves with new equipment. Paula bought a Golden Bracelet. Ness stocked up on supplies, while Jeff bought, of all things, a new tie for his uniform.
It was on their way out when disaster struck.
They were crossing the bottom foyer, when the people--everyone around them--vanished without a trace. The lights dimmed, until they could hardly see. A green streak zipped from behind a counter, grabbed Paula around the waist, and zipped off into the darkness.
"NESS!" She wailed as she was carried off.
"PAULA!" He stretched his hand uselessly after her.
A voice boomed over the P.A. "Customer Ness, from Onett, please report to the office on the fourth floor," It crackled.
Ness readied his bat. "All right, Jeff," He said. "Let's get ready to rumble!"
The pair dashed up the stairs, but were stopped by small piles of Worthless Protoplasms. Jeff fired at one, bowling it over, while Ness clubbed another, squashing it into oblivion.
Ness was fuming. The young boy's rage knew no bounds. His worst nightmare had been given life--the enemy had taken one of his friends!
"What if they torture her?" He asked Jeff. "What if they...>gulp!<...kill her? Jeff! We've got to save her!"
"I know," Jeff said, his face serious, and his gun cocked. "We will, Ness. We will."
"Customer Ness," The P.A. crackled. "Paula is waiting...GYYYYYAAAAAARRRRGGGG!"
The P.A. system that was housed in the corners of the room exploded at the loud shriek. The Onett-born hero shielded his head from the sparks, and charged up to the fourth floor. Jeff blasted the lock on the office door, and the pair ran in.
The green thing sitting behind the desk was just two eyeballs, a mouth, and about ten tentacles. It waved it's limbs at them.
"This store shall be your grave," It hissed in a soft, sibilant whisper. Jeff started forward, but Ness held him back.
"He's mine," he said simply, dropping his bat.
"Master Giygas will be pleased to know it was I who..."
>SLAM!<
The Dept. Store Spook wheeled backwards. Jeff gasped. He hadn't even seen the punch connect. Ness had flown across the room at an incredible speed, flooring the beast with one punch.
The Spook oozed to it's feet. It spit out a few teeth. "Well played, boy," It whispered. "But your life ends he-"
>CRACK!<
Ness kicked the thing in the face, hanging in the air while the Spook fell over. He darted under it, and kicked upward into it's spineless back. It rasped a horrible scream. Enraged, Ness brought his knee into the Spook's back, and then drove a two-fisted slam into it's face.
He gripped the thing by the folds around it's chin, and lifted it as high as he could with one hand, preparing a Rockin' Beta in his other.
"Now," he growled. His eyes were completely white. "Where's Paula? Where is she, you overgrown slimy squid-thing?!"
"Monotoli..." It rasped, barely audible. "She's with...Mono---to---li...."
The Dept. Store Spook dissolved in Ness' hand. He looked down.
"Monotoli?" he asked empty air. "Who's Monotoli?"
"We have to find her, Jeff," Ness was saying. "I don't care how long it takes. Even if it takes a million years! I'm going to find her..."
Jeff was flipping through a newspaper. It had been two days since Paula's kidnapping, and extensive research by the two friends had revealed who Mr. Monotoli was. He was the owner of a multi-billion dollar international company, that had it's headquarters in Fourside.
They were on their way to the Monotoli Building. Jeff squinted up through his glasses. The iron tower was enormous, spanning a full 200 floors.
"Monotoli's office is on the 66th floor," Jeff mumbled. "It's quite a ride."
"All areas beyond floor 65 are restricted," Ness replied. "We're here for information. If worse comes to worse, I'm gonna blow the whole building up!"
They carted up to the 65th floor, where two armed guards stopped them. One of them, a bald-headed man, spoke.
"You can't go through here," He growled. "Master Pokey is having a private conference."
"Master Pokey?" Ness growled back.
"That's right," The other guard said. "A short, pig-headed, blond-haired kid. Not any older than you, stubby-legs!"
"DAMNATION!" Ness' yell was audible throughout half of Fourside. "Pokey is always one step ahead! And, on top of that, he might be behind the whole scheme!"
Jeff and Ness were walking by a place called "Jackie's Cafe". There was a crowd building in the alley. The pair ran over to the throng.
"Hey," Jeff hailed a scruffy-looking urchin. "What's up?"
"Some guy is laying real still over there," the kid responded. "Looks dead!"
"Can we see?" Ness asked cautiously.
"Go ahead," He mumbled.
It was Mr. Everdred, the leader of Burglin Park, way back in Twoson. He was torn up pretty bad, and lay sprawled in the corner of the alley. Ness and Jeff ran over.
"Hey," Ness shook the thief's shoulder. "Hey, Everdred, wake up!"
"So this is Everdred?" Jeff asked. "You told me that he told you how to find the Apple Kid."
"That's right," He responded. "And this is one great guy. He's gotta pull through."
"N...Ness?" The crumpled man mumbled. "I-i-izzat you?"
"It's me," The young boy said in a comforting tone. "You'll be okay. Just lie still."
"Listen, Ness," Everdred coughed. "I found an object of great value. It's called the Mani Mani Statue..."
Ness almost doubled over. That was the same statue that Carpainter had drawn his evil power from back in Happy Happy Village. The golden horned man with a sword was definitely an evil object.
"I stole it from Carpainter, and wanted to hawk it for money in the big city, but...Geldegarde Monotoli stole it from me...HE BURGLED THE BEST THIEF IN TWOSON!" This was followed by a coughing fit.
"Listen," He continued. "The way to find Monotoli is in Jackie's Cafe. Behind the counter...it's the key to victory."
Jeff helped his struggle to his feet. "Don't try to follow me," Everdred said. "I'll go back to Twoson. Goodbye..."
They watched as the thief in the aloha shirt staggered out of the alley.
Jackie's Cafe was a smelly joint, where a hazy fog of nicotine and the stench of beer hung. Ness gagged as soon as he opened the door, but the two friends held their shirts to their noses, and trekked inside.
The half-stupefied patrons were of little help. All they did in response to any questions about Monotoli was belch and fart (their belching didn't compare to the wall cracking power of Master Belch's, however).
"Monotoli?" Jackie, a rough-looking man with a black moustache and an eye patch, said in response to their question. "Now why the heck would a business tycoon like him come to a joint like this?"
"I don't know," Ness was saying. "Maybe he wanted to have a few drinks."
"Hey, Ness," Jeff hailed from the corner. "I found something!"
"What is it?" Ness asked, ambling over.
"A door, or something. I can just...barely...get it...open...THERE!"
The door behind the counter flew open, and a bright light enveloped the pair. With a yell, they were sucked in.
And in Jackie's Cafe, the Jukebox was still playing.