"Okay," Skulryk said once Falcon and Simon were securely tied up again. "Now, I didn't want it to come to this, but I think it's time to use... the secret box."

Everyone gasped collectively. "But I thought the secret box was just a rumor!" Giampy exclaimed.

"You probably thought the sacred sword ______ was a rumor, too." Skulryk opened his hand to reveal a tiny box in his palm. "There are many things in this world that you don't know about."

FZ appeared apprehensive. "I heard that if you open the secret box, it destroys the entire universe in a matter of seconds..." He glanced at Skulryk, but it was Mr. A who provided the answer.

"I studied the secret box when I was working with PK Hack. If used correctly, it can patch anything up, even the most diabolical wound in a long-standing friendship; but if even the smallest thing goes wrong..." Shuddering, he trailed off. "I really hope you know what you're doing, Skul."

"Well, only one way to find out!" Using a pair of tweezers and a magnifying glass, Skulryk opened the secret box. There was a very small 'ding!' Skulryk scratched his head. "Hmm. Is something supposed to happen after that?"

"Maybe it's not compatible with this reality," JP suggested.

"Try hitting it," Giampi said. "That works with my computer."

Mr. A was stroking his chin in thought. "I think it's a little trickier than that. With old computer programs, you had to drag the problematic file onto the program to get it to work. We might have to drag Simon and Falcon over and stuff them in the box, or something."

Simon and Falcon shouted into the tape they'd been gagged with, but nobody heard them. Skulryk directed JP, FZ, and Mr. A to lift the dueling duo towards the box, on the basis that their names were acronyms and therefore easier to write. Just as they managed to get Falcon next to Simon, however, the box opened again and sucked them up in a burst of light.

"Neat," Giampi said. "Where'd they go?"

"I think they got... packed up." Skulryk picked up the secret box off the ground. "So that's what it does!"

"You didn't even know what it did before you used it?" Mr. A asked, beside himself with annoyance.

Skulryk harrumphed. "I don't see what's wrong with that."

"I hate to interrupt you guys, but are you taking this helicopter someplace?" Silver indicated Enrich Flavor's chopper with his claw. "See, I just got up from my nap, and I'm getting hungry..."

The group agreed to at least head for a nearby restaurant. Nobody argues with a hungry Tyrano.

The group took Enrich's helicopter and flew to the nearest Mooby's. They received another stroke of luck when they found the Fat Man's wallet outside since nobody had their wallet on them when they had been sucked into the GIFEverse. Silver Tyrano was in the Tyrano's Playground chewing on his Dark Figure figure that he had gotten in his Junior Tyrano's Meal. Everybody else, except for Simon and Falc who were still inside the secret box, was munching on their Potato Man fries and discussing the latest threat to their lives.

"We're dead!" Liar announced.

"Always the pessimist." Mr. Accident sighed.

"We are! Didn't you see Skul's last post? It was edited... by Dark Figure!!!"

"Don't worry. Some contrived plot device will save us. It always does." Giampi said.

"In any case we still need to get that laptop away from Raltise and Dark Figure. I wonder if Simon and Falc have gotten over their problems yet. " JP wondered.

"I'm tired now" Silver said after wondering away from the Playground.

"But you had a nap just a little while ago." Skulryk replied.

Silver gave Skul the look and Skul immediately paid for all the food and the group went off to the nearest motel that also had accommodations for Tyranos. For some strange reason Skul, Giampi and JP got stuck in the same room. They were all laying on their beds watching the dresser in front of them. Skulryk had placed the secret box on there so it wouldn't keep pinching his leg when they walked and now the box was dancing around wildly.

"Still fighting..." Giampi said wearily.

Everybody showered, brushed their teeth, got into their sleeping clothes and crawled into bed for the night. That night Giampi had a strange, pointless dream and it went something like this...

***************************************

Giampi was roaring down the track of the Kentucky Derby in his brand new Harley-Davidson. Being that he had more horses than everyone else he won easily. He walked triumphantly to the judge's stand where they offered him his prize. Sitting on a table were two small jellybeans. One was red and the other was blue. Giampi swallowed the red bean because red usually means cherry flavored. A few seconds later his eyes rolled back into his head and he passed out.

When he woke up he felt encased and had the taste of lime in his mouth. He fought against whatever he was in and started swimming upwards. A few seconds later Giampi broke through to the surface and tasted sweet air. There was something blocking his vision so he wiped whatever it was away from his eyes. When he could see clearly again his jaw dropped hard. Giampi was sitting in one of the harvester fields from the Matrix! Only instead of the usual pink the goo was differently colored in every cocoon. Giampi looked at himself. He was still clothed in his Kentucky Derby wear except there were clothespins with wires coming out of them attached to his fingers and toes. He reached for the back of his head only to find a plunger attached. On his face was an oxygen mask.

Giampi heard a whirring sound in the distance. He looked around as the sound got closer. Then one of the most frightening things he had ever saw in his life appeared on his cocoon. A small mechanical spider who's head was that of Bill Cosby.

"Oh, come on! There's always room for Jell-o!" Cosby-bot said.

Then the oxygen mask fell off, the clothespins released themselves and something forcibly removed the plunger. Giampi was rubbing his head when he heard the sound of a toilet being flushed. Suddenly he felt himself flying upwards. He was launched into the air and found himself heading towards a house that was flying in mid-air. Fortunately he flew through an open window and landed safely inside. In another room of the house he saw Alice from Alice in Wonderland surfing the internet. He knocked her out of the seat, logged onto Starmen.Net and started posting on GIFE. However at this time he woke up screaming.

"What?" JP asked wildly.

"Nothing. I just had a weird dream." Giampi said.

"Hey. Do you guys hear anything?" Skulryk asked.

"No."

They all looked to the dresser with the secret box. It had stopped moving and was just sitting there now.

"I think they've stopped fighting." Skulryk noticed.

While Giampi went to alert the others of the new, more peaceful behavior of the secret box, JP and Skulryk tackled an interesting dilemma:

"So how do you open it again?"

"Good question." Skulryk tried to pry the small box open, but the thing was sealed shut. For some strange and completely contrived reason they were going to have to figure out a new way to get it to open.

"Try hitting it," suggested JP. "Maybe you'll knock it loose."

Skulryk did as JP said and smashed the box against the near wall, but all he succeeded in doing was punching through the aluminum and leaving a big gap where he could see into the next room. An old lady was taking a shower.

"I give up," said Skulryk. "You try."

Skulryk threw the box to JP, who caught it and began scrutinizing over every inch of it in an attempt to figure out what to do. After a few seconds of close observation he noticed a small symbol on the front, consisting of a circle with a vertical line halfway through the center.

"A power button? I wonder what it does?"

JP slowly lowered his hand onto the power button and clicked it. Immediately the box began to power up, and it levitated out of JP's open hand.

"Man, what did you do?" asked Skulryk incredulously.

"I dunno," replied JP. "I guess I just turned it on."

Suddenly the box grew to the size of half the room, and flashed a hologram that read 'X-Gamestation, by Somicrotendo'. JP and Skulryk let out shrieks of horror.

The X-Gamestation enveloped everything in light. When the light subsided they were still in the room, but the place had been totally redecorated to look like a bright children's playhouse.

"What is this? Asked JP. "What happened to our room?"

After asking for answers and getting none, JP turned to Skulryk, who was pointing at him and snickering under his breath.

"What?"

Skulryk sniggered once more. "Dude, you have the goofiest hat."

JP lifted a hand and felt his head. There was a strange beanie on it. Upon further inspection he noticed that his entire attire had been changed, as had Skulryk's. While JP was wearing baggy pants and a blue shirt, Skulryk was decked out in full Adidas wear.

JP's eyes went wide.

"Uh-oh?"

Skulryk frowned. "Uh-oh? That's bad, right?"

"Oh, it's bad alright," replied JP. "We've been sucked into a Parappa the Rapper game."

Suddenly strange, Japanese rap music emanated from an unknown source, and a huge, walking onion appeared in the room.

"Ack! This is bad," said Skulryk. "What do we do?"

"The only thing we can do..." said JP. "Rap."

With that Chop Chop Master Onion began rapping...

"Kick! Punch! It's all in the mind
If you wanna test me, I'm sure you'll find
that all the things, I'll teach ya is sure to beat ya,
nevertheless you'll get a lesson from teacher now

Kick!"

JP and Skulryk kicked.

"Punch!"

They punched.

"Chop!"

They did.

"Block!"

They blocked.

"Once more now Kick! Punch! Chop! Block!"

Skulryk posed on that last one, thus failing to block. Instantly he tripped and fell.

"Dude, you rappin' awful," commented JP.

"Shut up," retorted Skulryk. "This bites. I'ma put an end to this "#$ right %?! now, &#@."

As if on cue a decked out Camaro burst in through the wall, and the sound system began busting out rhymes. Skulryk ripped off his Adidas wear to reveal a black leather jacket with five gold chains hanging from his neck, two diamond rings on each finger, and a pair of sunglasses. Several beepers hung from his belt. The fully thugged-out Skul got in the Camaro, which began cranking out Wu-Tang and bouncin' up and down. Several women in skimpy bikinis emerged from behind the Camaro and began dancing while Skul's crew stood behind them, arms crossed.

The power of Skulryk's gangsta rap was too much for the X-Gamestation to handle, and the system overloaded amidst a storm of bling. Chop Chop Master Onion disappeared, and a hologram appeared that read, 'You Win!'

Skulryk got out of the Camaro and slipped off his sunglasses. "Flawless Victory," he announced.

JP noticed his clothes returning to normal. "Hey, I think we did it! The box is finally opening!"

Skulryk, now in normal clothing, nodded. "Yep. Hey look, there's Simon and Falcon."

The two walked up to the now-open box and peered inside. They let out gasps of surprise.


In the meantime Giampi burst into the other room, where Liar, Hobo Mike, FZ, and Mr. A were watching television. Silver was fast asleep in the Tyrano-sized bed that was coincidentally in the room when they checked in.

"So they stopped fighting? Cool," said Mr. A.

"That means we can finally get them out," added Liar. "Come on, let's go."

"If you don't mind, I'll stay here," grumbled Tyrano from his bed. "And even if you do, I ain't moving."

Giampi led everyone out of the room and down the hallway to the room he had been sharing with JP and Skulryk. They opened the door and found them standing in the doorway, nervous looks on their faces.

"So?" asked FZ. "Where are they?"

"About that..." JP chuckled nervously, his hands behind his back. "There's been a little...mishap. Do you want the good news or the bad news first?"

"Good," replied Mr. A. "And make it snappy."

"Okay..." muttered Skul. "The good news is they stopped fighting, and we got them out of the box."

"And the bad?"

JP took out his hand and showed the party the two small, furry animals he had concealed in his palm, behind his back.

"They've been turned into chipmunks," he said nervously.

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