Lost journal of the possessed.
Hey diary, I decided to start using you. I've been goin through a few tough times since Christmas and I guess it's a good idea to confide in you. I think that naming diaries is stupid, so I'm not gonna name you. But I should let you know who's writing in you.
My name is Paula, and I am a young woman who has experienced quite a bit. I defeated a monstrous beast named "giygas" with the help of some of my best friends. I also have these psychic powers, telekinesis if you will. I can maim or aid opponents or friends with. I have deep religious beliefs and trust in my God with all my heart. I have been having a few troubles lately though. Let me recount them for you:
Yesterday, I was walking along a path to my buddy ness' house. He's one of the ones who helped me defeat giygas. While I was walking, I spotted a hound on the road. I neared it and discovered it was rabid. I tried to tame the beast with my powers, but it didn’t work. It just got knocked out. I rushed to ness' house to phone the police. After an hour, the police arrived at the door. There was no dog. There were only tracks leading to ness' house. Ness says it was just a mirage or a drift or something. It was pretty heavy snow, so that could be it, but it felt so real. Oh well, I guess I'll write tomorrow. I'm sure everything will be better.
School was sweet today. We decided to have a field trip out to the Chemistry laboratory in winters. I saw Jeff there, and he showed the WHOLE class around. I had a great time, and we learned a whole lot about thermo-nuclear physics. We didn’t understand it, but we sure learned it. The thing is, I thought it was a little boring. All the other kids thought it was sweet, but I didn’t really care too much. I guess that’s what killing the ultimate evil in the universe does to a person.
Hello again, I'm just writing to say something. I feel something about ness. It's like I can see this weird aura coming off him and all the other kids too. They have a very light tint of some weird color I cannot describe, but it is definently there. Ness' is the strongest of them all. It wasn’t that bad except when I looked at myself, I saw a red and yellow aura surrounding me. Two colors, intertwining like fire. I only saw the yellow and something color on ness. Come to think of it, I have a little bit of that color, but not much. I think I may be sick, so wish me well, cause this is kinda weird.
Well, I wasn’t sick. I'm still seeing clouds around people. Except now the clouds are getting denser and easier to see. I can see them around everyone. I see green or blue ones around my parents and other adults. I see a yellow one around kids and a bright blue one around ness and Jeff. I see red around me. I saw the dog again. I couldn’t do anything because it ran off, but it had a red one too. Ness' dog doesn’t have any aura. I'm going to sleep early today, I think I'm just tired.
Well, this does it. I don't think I’m sick, I think it's a new psychic power I’m attaining. I have no idea were I got it, but it seems to outline people fairly evenly. I was a little freaked out today when I saw ness and got a chill down my spine, but I bet it was just this frigid weather. The weatherman calls for snow tomorrow, like, about 3 feet. This is great, cause I have to do a presentation and I think I'll be able to use the extra time. Anyways, I saw the dog again. He was completely red now. There was no cloud, just a blotch of growling red. He ran yet again, but not after barking 3 times right at me. I called the cops again, but I was so scared that I don't know if they understood me. I hope I never see it again.
Heh, I have that project done. It's cool, it’s about how Mr. Verlendek founded Eagleland. I worked hard on it and it really paid off. I also called all my friends today. It's cool, ness got this padding in his room so he can train his powers to be really accurate. Poo has been training indoors for gymnastics. He says once he is done that he will be able to move about in a speedier and more graceful manner. I think it's pretty cool. Jeff of course is playing with gizmos. I had to call him after school though because even if you’re snowed in, at snow wood you get classes. I didn’t talk too long though, I don't know why but I felt uncomfortable when I was talking to them. It’s just that weird feeling, it’s really creepy. I saw that dog again today. This time it barked at me twice, and I was nervous. I also felt a bit of comfort, but I don't want to. Maybe the cops will find the stupid thing and put it to sleep.
Well now, this is above all the worst day I've had this year. I went to school and was supposed to present in front of the class. I got great marks for the product, but not presentation. I was soooo nervous up there. I looked at ness, then the other kids and felt overwhelmed with... pity? It couldn’t have been. I felt all kinds of things. Pity, helplessness, sorrow, mourning, fear... hate. I don't know why, but the feeling just took me over and I could barely read from my paper. The class laughed at me, but soon stopped when I felt angry. I don't know why, but they all left me alone for the rest of the day. Oh, the dog came. I called when I saw it coming, and it got on my front lawn and barked once. It left before the police came. They say if I call once more they will arrest me.
This is very surprising. I don't have any more friends. All of them will not talk to me except ness. Even Poo and Jeff won't answer the phone. Ness told me that when I got angry, a cloud of flame started to surround my body and a radiant glow of heat came forth from my body. He said that everyone felt fear when it happened. Even he did. He said he hasn’t felt this kind of fear since giygas. It doesn’t matter though, those kids freak me out. I don't need them. Ness' voice is even starting to get annoying. The dog came today. But it left after simply smiling. It seemed a purer red today.
I got suspended today. My parents don't know about it and I’m not going to tell them. They said I hurt this kid, but I don't even remember it. All I remember is he was making fun of me, and calling me names, then suddenly, I was somewhere else. I was in the office. They say that John, that’s his name, is in the hospital. He'll be alright, only minor burns, but I don't even remember doing anything. It's really weird. I think I’m going to visit summers tomorrow.
Ok, this is getting weird. I had a dream last night. I dreamt that I was in a rage and that I used my power to burn john. I remember swearing and threatening people who brought me to the office. I felt all the feelings and everything. I also heard a dog. It wasn’t barking, I just heard it. I was able to catch it out of the corner of my eye while hurting john. It was the red dog. Aside from that, summers was great. There were lots of cute guys around and it was a beautiful day. All though I think I shark came in the water cause this one chick who was being kinda rude suddenly sank in the water. People were looking around, but I don't think they ever found her. Her glow was gone. It was pretty quite after that, and not many people were on the beach. I guess that they were afraid of the shark.
Even though I’m not suspended, I stayed home today. I feel afraid every time I decide to go.. The furthest I've been able to achieve was the front step. I dreamed that I was in summers and that I used my most powerful lightening bolt power to kill some girl in the water. She was shouting obscenities and in the dream, I felt oddly pleasurable. Almost as if a surge filled my body when she died. I hope that this didn’t happen, and that my mind is only playing cruel tricks on me. I saw the dog again. It was smiling its evil smile, and it was a comforting shade of red. I don't know what's happened, but if its what I’m thinking, then I hope that I can get help.
I'm writing from jail today. They say that I killed a woman in summers and that john had a turn for the worse. They said that he woke up screaming "SHE'S IN MY MIND" over and over again and then died of heart failure. I dreamt that I did that. They also say they suspect me of something else too. They say I took one of the little kids from the daycare, led him upstairs, and completely incinerated him. They have ashes and things, but I hope it wasn’t me. The charred helmet is in front of the cell. If it's that one kid who thinks of me like a mom, and what I did is true, I hope that I never dream tonight.
They say they've proven me guilty and I’m staying here for a while. OF course, here is relative. I broke out today. I found myself drift out of my body, and I saw a blurred vision of myself using my powers to escape. I killed some people apparently, but had no control. All I felt was a shocked horror that I could do such a thing. I dreamt of killing that kid, and in the dream I did it slowly, and painfully. I loved it there, in the dream. If only I could close my eyes in the dream, then I could just enjoy it, instead of hating myself later.
Fugitive from the law, not what I pictured for my future. I saw that they're out hunting for me. I'm wanted dead, not alive. They say I’m too dangerous. I harmed more today, this time it wasn’t as blurred, but I felt more like the Paula I saw, not the Paula I am. If only you could speak and give me some advice. I regularly reminiss about my wrongdoings in my dreams now. It's getting hard to put off. I don't know why this is happening. I can’t believe that this is me.
I wish I could kill that dog. It came to me at night and lay beside me. I woke up and I felt comfortable with it, even though I suspect it is what has influenced me. I have no more blurred visions. I am now in the body. When something evil can be done, I do it. It isn’t because I want to... it's because I have to. The longer I do the right thing, the more it hurts. It makes me feel as if I am weak, and that I am not worth anything. When I kill, or maim, or hurt, I get a rush of feeling good. I feel appreciated. The dog is now with me all the time. I know its evil and that I should kill it, but I can’t seem to bring myself to it. Please, if I lose this diary, or something happens, understand what I’m saying. I don't want to, but something says I have to.
O precious diary, what has become of me? I want help, but cannot find it. I cant because I kill those that I ask for help. Everyone must think I lure in and kill. I can’t help it. I saw a mirror today. I have a red glow, like the dog. I can’t be evil can I? I don't want to, but something is making me. You know, I don't even hurt anymore. I kill. The dreams are getting harder to withstand. They aren’t only telling the past, but I can see myself in the future, murdering my friends and liking it. Please help me. I am lost and I don't know how I can be found.
I slipped up today. The army saw me and I think that they are on my trial. I killed some of their soldiers today, one of them my father. I want help, but no one trusts me. It's as if one half of me is good, the one that is writing. The other half forces my body to do horrible things. I feel all these feelings now. I feel disappointed because of my slip up... I want to die, but I want to kill ness first. I can’t get to his house, wouldn’t matter anyway, he's in the army too. Everyone is after me. Maybe I can escape.
I've been running for days, but I think my time is up. I have succeeded in killing everyone I used to consider a friend and everyone I have loved. Now I only feel hate. I'm learning to accept my new self, no matter how much I hate it. I figure I have only minutes before I am found and executed. Good night diary, and maybe I can die. Finally.