THE CHRISTMAS SONG, #EARTHBOUND VERSION

By CPTCrunch

(Sung to the tune of "The Christmas Song."  If you don't know that tune, crawl out from under your rock and download
the Nat King Cole version.)

Chestnuts burning in the microwave
Gruff Goats trampling over you
UFOs flying out of a caaaaaave
Crows dressed up all well-to-do

Everybody knows 
The Bubble Monkey's kind of strange
As lamers get kicked aaaand wonder whyyyy
Tessie Watchers out in the cold, all deraaaaaanged
Screaming and pointing at the sky

They think that Saaaaaanta's on his way
But Annual Gift Man saaaabotaged his sleigh
And every mother's chiiiiild is gonna cry
When they find out all nine reindeer crashed and diiiiiiied

And so I'm offering this simple song
Because I want a mugz0r tooooo
And even though you knew I would say it all aloooooong
Merry *bleep* Christmas to youuuuuu

*REPEAT 273 TIMES*

©® and ™ 2001 CPTCrunch.  All rights reserved.