CHAPTER X: Onward, to Threed!
Ness and Paula sat together on a log, next to the roaring campfire. Burlap came from the shadows, carrying a 24-Pack of cola. He lobbed one to each of them, and popped one for himself. Ness was talking quietly with Elwood. About twenty Twoson citizens had come to see the Runaway Five off, and small campfires dotted the field next to the Chaos Theater.
Elwood stood atop a log, addressing the surrounding crowd. "Hey, everyone! My little buddy Ness and I are gonna do a duet," he called, slipping something small and shiny to the young boy. Ness got up on the log, and gestured to Burlap, who was faking Bass on his keyboard, and Jim, readying his drums. The two began to sing.
Elwood: "An old cowpoke went ridin' out, one dark and windy day...
Upon a ridge he rested as he went along his way...
When all at once, a mighty herd of red-eyed cows he saw,
a-plowin' through the ragged skies...
and up the cloudy draw..."
Ness: "Yippee-yai-ay....
Yippee-yai-oh...
The Ghost Herd in
the sky..."
Ness: "Their brands were still on fire, and their hooves were made of steel...
Their horns were black and shiny, and their hot breath he could feel...
A bolt of fear went through him, as they thundered through the sky...
For he saw the riders comin' hard...
As he heard their mournful cry..."
Elwood: "Yippee-yai-ay...
Yippe-yai-oh...
Ghost Riders in
the sky..."
Elwood: "Their faces gaunt, their eyes were blurred, and shirts all soaked with sweat..."
Ness: "They're ridin' hard to catch that herd, but they ain't caught 'em yet..."
Elwood: "Cause they got to ride forever in that range up in the sky..."
Ness: "On horses snortin' fire..."
Both: "As they ride on, hear their cry..."
Both: "Yipee-yai-ay...
Yippe-yai-oh...
Ghost Riders in
the sky..."
At this point, Ness pulled out the shiny object, a Blues Harmonica, and put it to his lips. He began playing a mournful, though fast-paced strain that sounded beautiful echoing in the night. Once he finished, they began singing again.
Elwood: "As the Riders loped on by him, he heard one call his name..."
Ness: " 'If you wanna save your soul from Hell, a ridin' on our range...' "
Elwood: " 'Then, Cowboy, change your ways today, or with us you will ride...' "
Both: " 'A-tryin' to catch the devil's herd...
Across the endless sky...' "
Both: "Yippee-yai-ay...
Yippee-yai-oh...
Ghost Riders in
the skyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!"
There was a great, loud cheering from the crowd, as Elwood and Ness climbed down from the log. Ness gave the Harmonica back to Elwood.
"You're one jiving little kid," The bluesman complimented him as the two wandered over to where Paula, Jake, and Lucky sat.
"Thanks, Elwood," He replied modestly.
Paula jumped up at his approach. "That was amazing, Ness!" She complimented. "You two make a great team. Where did you learn to play the Harmonica like that?"
He shrugged self-consciously. "M'dad taught me when I was nine," He said.
Jake grinned. "The squirt's a natural harp-player. I'll bet my shoes he'll be a bluesman someday!"
Lucky thought for a moment. "Now," he said. "You got us out of the Chaos Theater, and now we need to pay you back."
Paula sighed deeply. "We absolutely HAVE to get to Threed, but..."
"Right!" Jim exclaimed from a rock nearby. "Threed it is!"
Ness looked around. "But the Ghosts..."
Burlap laughed. "Didn't you know?" He asked. "The Ghosts can't stand happy or loud music. And our bus is the happiest, loudest bus in the world!"
Ness' jaw dropped. This was just too good to be true!
Paula pulled a blanket out of her pack. "We'd better get some sleep, Ness," She said. "Tomorrow, the battle begins again."
The next day, the party loaded onto the "Hunk'o'Junk", the Runaway Five's bus. They drove south until they reached the Threed Tunnel. A chill wind struck the bus, as ghostly shapes appeared at the windows.
"GO BACK!" They wailed. "GO BACK!"
Jake grinned, started clapping his hands rhythmically, and began singing. After the first verse, everyone else joined in. Elwood cranked the radio, and they all sang along. Ness and Paula were really enjoying themselves. The Ghosts at the window slowly backed away.
They emerged into what should've been bright daylight, but dark gray clouds covered the sun. The few people that were in the streets of Threed were casting glances around, as if Freddy Krueger was stalking them. The Runaway Five stopped to see them off.
"You little buggers took us from nightmare to a dream," Burlap said.
"Yeah," Elwood put in. "And I'm sure you can brighten this place up with your own brand of sunshine."
"Thank you all," Ness said. "We'll see 'ya a little further down the road."
"In Fourside," Jake said. "That's where we'll be singin' next."
"Good," Paula said. "After we're finished here, we'll pay a call."
"Next time, Munchkins," Jim said.
"Later, Potaters," Lucky intoned.
The band piled on their bus, leaving Ness and Paula alone in the streets of Threed. Paula tapped Ness' shoulder.
"Giygas' influence is strong here," She said. "Can you feel it?"
"You bet I can," he said, the hairs on the back of his neck rising. "It's not coming from the people, but rather an outside force."
They accosted an elderly lady with a bag of groceries.
"Excuse me, Miss," Ness asked demurely. "What's going on in this town?"
She stared at him. "You really don't know?"
"No. We just got here, and..."
"How'd you get past the Ghosts?"
"Long, story," Paula cut her off. "Now, what's happening?"
"Zombies," She wailed. "They've taken over the town! We've tried exterminating them, but their headquarters is the graveyard, and we can't even get close. They seem to be guarding the path to Grapefruit Falls, but we don't know why!"
"Hm..." Ness said to himself. "Maybe it's time we did some snooping around. First Ghosts, then Zombies...Giygas is starting to notice us now."
The partners entered the Drug Store nearby, and bought new equipment. Ness got a Minor League Bat, and Paula received a Thick Fry Pan. Ness decided to call his mom back in Onett.
>Ring< >Ring<
"Hello?" A voice said over the phone.
"Hi, mom."
"Ooooooooh! Ness, honey! It's been two weeks since you called last!"
"Two weeks and two days, actually."
They got to talking for a while, Ness telling her about all his little adventures and side-trips, and the incident with Threed.
"I read about that in the paper," His mom said. "I hope you'll be okay!"
"I'll be fine, mom."
"Yes, you will. You're my brave little warrior, and like I said the night you left, you'll go far!"
"Okay...I gotta go, mom. Bye!"
"I love you honey!"
>Click!<
He smiled at the phone for a moment, then turned to Paula.
"If what that old woman said was true, then the leader of the Zombies is probably around Grapefruit Falls." He took a moment to look on his map. "That's to the north, through the Graveyard. And the area to the East of the Falls is just...blank. Like unexplored area."
Paula put her hand gently on his shoulder, looking at the map. "Wow. Well, I suppose we'll find what it is when we get there, huh? Let's get going to Grapefruit Falls."
They reached the Graveyard gate about ten minutes later. Near the center of the 'yard, dark shadows shambled with limping gaits, as if patrolling the parameter while sleepwalking. Various grunts and low moans found their way into Ness' ears.
"Kind of freaky," Paula whispered. "Isn't it?"
They ran through, always heading north, and crouching behind gravestones and monuments to avoid being seen. At last, they left the graveyard, onto the path leading to Grapefruit Falls. Ness deduced from his map that the only way there was an underground tunnel, and that was exactly what the two teens were headed for.
But they never quite got there. Blocking their path were two Zombies. Ness sniffed the air. It smelled like rotting meat.
The Zombies watched the two approach. Paula stepped forth.
"Let us pass!" She called, her voice slicing the air with a cruel tone. "Or face getting fried!"
The Zombies just sat there.
"All right, rotting boys!" She said, holding her hand in the air. "Time to fry! PSI Fire Beta!"
A huge flame burst from her fingers. It struck the two Zombies, and a choking cloud of smelly smoke rolled towards them. When it cleared, the two rotted men were still there.
"What the heck?!"
"Let me try, Paula," Ness said, taking a step forward. "Let's do it! PSI Rockin'!"
The burst of red and blue energy struck the two Zombies head-on. They remained unaffected.
Paula gawked at the two unscathed undead. Ness was ready to hit something. preferably, the Zombies. He whipped out his bat, and clubbed one of them in the head. It moaned a little, but otherwise did nothing.
Ness growled, and clubbed it again. And again. And again! The zombie did not yield. Finally, Paula, grabbed the raging boy's arm.
"It's no use," She said. "We'll have to find some other means to get to the Grapefruit Falls."
He sighed. "I guess you're right," He conceded.
"Pathetic! Absolutely pathetic! We've searched this whole darn town, with not a clue as to another path to Grapefruit Falls!"
Needless to say, Ness was steamed. They had been walking around Threed for the last four hours, trying to find another way. The only thing they found was that annoying Photographer, who snapped their picture again.
"I'm really starting to think...huh?"
Ness had cut off. A woman, dressed from head to toe in black leather, was eyeing the two teens. She gave a seductive sneer, and ran into the Threed Sunset Hotel.
Ness growled menacingly. "Did you feel that?" He asked Paula.
"Sure did," She said. "The energy she emits is just too high to be a normal person's. She's got to be one of Giygas' hench--er--women."
He nodded, stalking towards the hotel. "Let's just show her what we think of her leader!"
They made their way cautiously inside. Glimpsing the woman, they ran after her into a hotel room.
A flashlight blazed in front of their eyes, just bright enough to make them shield against the beams.
When the light swung away, there was a group of Zombies and a zombie dog, all massed in front of the woman. She pointed at the pair, and the group advanced.
Ness readied his bat. The situation looked hopeless, he knew, but...
"Ugh...oof...wha?"
Ness woke up in a bare room, with a single light suspended from the ceiling. Paula leaned over him, a concerned look on her face, framed by her disheveled mass of golden hair. She smiled when he woke, throwing her arms around him.
"Ness! You're okay!"
He winced as she squeezed him. "Yeah...and a little sore, too..."
"Oh, sorry."
"Where are we?" He asked, rubbing his head.
She sighed. "Some kind of prison cell," She mumbled. "The door is locked. See if you can blow it open with your Rockin' skill."
"All right," he mumbled groggily, standing up. "Here we go! PSI Rockin'!"
--Sputter...sput-sput....fttttttt...--
Nothing happened.
"Uh...PSI Rockin'!"
Still nothing.
"Wow," Paula said, leaning against the wall. "This room must nullify our Psychic Powers. Let's hope my Telepathy still works..."
Ness turned to her, his eyes questioning. "Who 'ya gonna call?":
But she was already in a deep trance.
"Jeff...Jeff...hear me..."