Alright, I have a great idea:

Ness, Paula, Jeff, and Poo are:........AMERICAN TRAVEL FARE INSPECTORS!!!!!!!!!


Eagleland: (I really love to write these in scripts, it's a lot less draining on my energy level, but I'll cut the font changing tags this time)

The scene starts in Onett, Ness is on his front poarch.

Ness: Man o man! Another election come and gone, yet the same mayor keeps getting re-elected. I'm kinda sick a' Pirkle. Oh well, it's not like I have any say, I can't vote, I'm only fourteen (Ness realizes he is talking to himself, Ness is trying to stop this). Crap, who am I talking to anyway?

Just then, a man in a black '50s suit comes up to a nearby tree and staples a sign to it. After he has left, Ness takes the liberty to read it.

Sign: Attention! All worthy onettians! Come to a special emergancy town meeting tonight at City Hall in B.H pirkles board room! Tonight at six (tonight is Monday!), be there, be square!

Ness: Hmm..., I consider myself a worthy Onettian, maybe I'll check it out. I wonder if mom wants to go?

Ness checks the house, unfortunatly his mother wasn't around, Ness finds a note claiming that his mom and dad are on a date in Fourside.

Ness: Umph! She sees him more than I do, oh well. Maybe I can get Paula to come along. (Ness teleports to Twoson)

Paula is at home, with Jeff and Poo playing "spin the bottle" Ness walks in on them as Paula and Jeff are about to carry out obligations.

Ness: HEY! WHADYA THINK YOUR DOING!! PAULA? WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON?!!? AND WHY WASN'T I INVITED?!

Paula: Oh Ness, really, it's nothing big, we were just playing a game, and boom, you walked in. It was only a game, really.

Ness: Oh, well yeah, but, why wasn't I invited?

Paula: We figured it might be best if we just waited for you, I kinda senced you might be dropping by.

Ness: (skeptical, but letting go) oh whatever. Anyway I was about to go to a meeting that looks like an intresting requirement. Not to mention I want to fulfill my goals as a worthy onettian. So I was wonderin' if you wanted to hitch a ride along, and since the gangs all here, does everyone else wanna go?

Paula: Sure, we can do this later, guys?

Poo: (quiet until now) Well, to find more information on this country, it would be a plus, I will attend.

Jeff: Sure, why not? Thanks for not killing me back there Ness, I want to live to see fifteen.

Ness: Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure, sure, sure, lets go now, c'mon, it's starting soon! (Ness and the gang teleport to Onett, ariving in Pirkles confrence room as soon as it starts).

Pirkle: Howdy Doodey Onett! How is everyone? Eh? Eh?

Crowd: (in unision) What did you call us out of our homes for!

Pirkle: Oh yeah, that. Well, ya see, theres this other country west a' here called America and I've always wanted to see this country and whatnot, anyway my phone isn't workin' so I can't call the head cheese Enrich Flavor in Fourside to get the heads up on Travel fare prices that are worldwide. So the reason y'all here is so I can get a recruit to go to Fourside to talk ta' David for me, well, anyone?

No one is saying anything, so Ness stands up.

Ness: Sure, I really don't have anything else to do, it won't even take us that long, so sure, we'll do it!

Pirkle: Ha HA! Once again you save the day Ness! And as hazard pay, I'll give you guys a whole hundred bucks, howz that sound?

Paula: a hundred dollars don't buy much here Pirkle.

Pirkle: Yes, but it does in America!

Jeff: What makes you think we were going to America? I thought it was just Fourside?

Pirkle: Oh yeah, thats right, ah well, a hundred bucks, take it or leave it.

Ness: Okay, ya' got me.

Poo: Then we are Foursidebound? Shall I teleport? Or will you?

Ness: Could you get it? My brain in numb from that boring street preformer.

Paula and Jeff: What street preformer?

Ness: Uh, well, I got a little entertaintment before I got here.

Poo: No use trying to understand my friends, he is a little strange you know, well, lets go. (The four teleport east).

Now were in Fourside. At the former Montoli building now owned by Mr. Enrich Flavor.

Jeff: Wow, this place hasn't changed very much, still the same old Montoli building.

Paula: Now Jeff, thats not the real name here anymore. Soon, there won't even be a sign up like that.

Poo: I have never seen the inside of this building, the same is true for many buildings in this society.

Ness: Well, were here.

Jeff: Where was Montoli's office again? The back of the building, on the top floor? I think it was.

Ness: Yep, I think so. Well, lets go! (Going to Flavors' office)

Paula: Well, should we knock?

Ness: Nah, we know this guy, remeber? We bailed him out and got his job back, he should respect us enough.

Enrich Flavor is at his gold plated desk in his gold plated room. What a mansion.

Ness: Hey! Mr. Flavor! We have a question for you!

Enrich: Whats that Ness? And--

Paula: Well, the question is we were sent here by Prikle to see what a place called America is like, not to mention mainly the travel fares, and we were wondering if you knew.

Enrich: Oh yeah, that place. No, not really. I was gonna go today, but I forgot. Would you mind doing it for me? By the way--

Jeff: Okay, I guess. But Ness, you've never been to America, how are you gonna get there, you can't teleport.

Ness: Ah, never fear. I went to America with my dad a long time ago, I can remeber enough to go there.

Paula: Cool! Lets go!

Friends go outside and TP to Berlin Germany.

Jeff: Uh, I don't think this is America.

Ness: oops! Uh, it's not. Wait just a sec I'll try it again. Stupid street preformer!

Poo: Who is this strange figure of a street preformer!

Ness gets it right this time. The four land outside Washinton D.C

Paula: Alright, where do we go from here?

Jeff: I think that this big white marble building is the travel agency! Lets go inside.

The four move near the White House. When the get to the entrance, they are greeted by two men eating lunch on the steps.

Guy 1: Hey, you kids can't go in here, this is the White House!

Guy 2: Yeah the White House!

Ness: Uh, whats a "White House" this place looks white, isn't this a travel agency?

Guy1: Travel agency? Wha--, scram you little punks!

Guy 2: Yeah! Little punks!

Guy 1: You are really annoying, do you know that?

Ness: No, we don't feel like it. Were gonna get inside this travel agency to answer a question for our mayor, like it or not!

Guy 1: Alright then, you asked for it!

Guy 2: Uh, Harry, what are you doin'? Oh yeah uh, Yeah! You asked for it!

Ta Da! Another friendly battle with fire ice and energy waves! Due to good censorship, I'm leaving what happens the the guard and Harry out of the fic.

Harry: uh, ah *gasp* *cough* I can't believe these freaks a' nature!

Guy 2: Everythings goin' dark Harry! I...I...I'm outta here, later you sucker! Ha HA!

Harry: Some co-worker, oh well. I'm frozen and my hair is burnt, so I can't stop you. Have fun at the White House.

Poo: The entrace is clear

Ness: Nothin' stoppin' us, lets go.

Paula: Onward!

Jeff: Wait, we might need this (Jeff picks up a small white pass from the guards pocket) it looks somehow important.

Harry: Hey! That's mine! Wait, don't take my pass! Aww, crud. Thats the third time this week!

Ness and the gang move inside the house, the move within the halls until they are stopped by a woman in a cleaning outfit.

Cleaner Woman: Hey, you kids don't look very offical, let me see your passes!

Ness: Wow, thats a nice thing to say to someone, your just a cleaner lady, you don't even have the authority to ask for passes!

Cleaner Woman: Oh, oh, yeah, thats right. But, I've always wanted to see a pass, can I please see at least one?

Jeff: Sure, I've got one see.

Cleaner Woman: Ah HA! Your not Harry! I've got you now! Just wait until I start screaming for help, you'll all be useless! Ha Ha Ha! (The lady is cut short by a sharp freezing sound, she instantly solidifies).

Paula: That PSI freezin'. Always good for getting people to stop talking.

Ness: Hey, lets go in this door, it maybe "Bush" is the name of a travel agent!

Jeff: Worth a shot, lets go.

The four enter the room to see a guy with graying brown hair, a round face and an expensive suit and tie sitting at a desk playing a game at his computer. At the same time, a man in a navy blue suit with lots of badges is trying to talk to him.

Navy blue suit guy: All I'm sayin' GW, is that we should go with it, it's a real plus for D.C and all over-- (cut short by giggling from the other man).

GW: look! It's a cat! Well, thats just about the cutest darn thing I've seen all day! Ha Ha! I wanna see that again! Oh, were you sayin' somethin' Colin?

Ness interupts the conversation

Ness: Uh, Hey, people! Were from Eagleland and we were wondering if you guys were travel agents.

Colin: How did you kids get in here?! Hey, security!

Jeff: Hey, now lets not jump to conclusions, we have a very imortant country issue to resolve!

Paula: We need to know what travel fares are in this country! Can you guys help?

GW: (still gigling at the game) Wha--? Who are you kids? How'd ya' get here? Are you the pizza delivery people?

Poo: Sir, I can reliably tell you we do not deliver western society starch discs.

Colin: Look, we aren't a travel agency! This is a highly sensitave area! How did you get past our guards anyway? (Gaurds enter the room). Ah, yes, security, it's about time can you--

Ness: C'mon man, just hear us out. We just want to know travel fares!

GW: Now Colin, let the littleuns speak! Now, kids, whats your names?

Ness: I'm Ness, and this is my friend Paula, my other friend Jeff Andonuts, and my crown prince friend Poo.

GW: Woah, your little prince friend, how bigs your country anyhow?

Poo: We are a modest small hard working country good sir, that is all I have to tell.

Colin: GW, please, it's not worth it! Mr. President, c'mon, it's just kids that aren't even supposed to be here!

GW: Well, they got here, I think the deserve to be heard out. Now, what did y'all want again?

Ness: Thank you sir, anyway we need to know what the travel fares are for this country. The mayor of our town is seriously needing a vacation on his fifth re-election to office. We came from Eagleland, any ideas?

GW: Personaly son, I've never had to buy my own travel expenses for, well, forever! Sorry I can't help you.

Jeff: Naw, I guess thats okay. Thanks anyway.

Paula: Yes, thank you sir.

Poo: Good day sir.

Ness: Alright, I guess we're leaving then. Goodbye!

GW: Goodbye! Colin, say goodbye, aw fine then, be that way! Alright back to the screen, ha ha! It's the cat again!

Ness and friends teleport back to Onett, and report to Pirkles office.

Pirkle: Well, did ya get my info, eh, uh uh?

Ness: They didn't know, sorry mayor.

Pirkle: Whadya mean? Enrich didn't know?

Ness: (to avoid more work that night, it was late now) Yep, he didn't know, sorry Mr. Pirkle, maybe next time.

The four quickly leave. Pirkle is left alone in his office.

Pirkle: Well, now. How am I ever going to get to America in time for the Super Bowl. *Sigh*, oh wait! It's over! Yeah thats right, I watched it on the tube! I almost feel sorry for those kids, I made em' go all the way to Fourside for somethin' I almost didn't need! What a trip!