Her curvacious hips swayed as she made her way down the hallway of the Sunset Hotel in Threed.  It was all Ness could do to keep his attention on remaining hidden and not standing and drooling at the sight.  After all, they WERE tailing her.

Paula had been frequently voicing her concerns over the woman -- there was something all too suspicious about the situation, almost as if she were aware that they were following her in secret.  In addition, neither of the two teenagers had seen a single soul since they followed the woman into the building, which unnerved Paula more than anything else.

But Ness was convinced she was somehow connected to the zombies which were currently roaming the streets of town.  He was willing to take the risk of following her into a trap if it meant getting some information.

That was it.  Information.  Not because she was wearing a bikini in a temperate zone in the middle of spring or anything.

She reached a door about halfway down the corridor and opened it.  It registered vaguely in Ness's mind how odd it was that it hadn't been locked, or how she didn't even attempt to look out for suspicious people before entering.  However, Ness had always been notoriously poor at following up on hunches, and this time was no exception.

He reached the door she had just entered, with Paula close behind looking furtively around at the surroundings.  "Ness, I really don't think this is such a good idea," she attempted for the fifth time.

"I'm telling you, there's something suspicious about that lady, Paula!  If we pass up on this opportunity, we may never find out where the zombie leader is!" he replied.

She frowned, but didn't attempt to stop him.  Something told her that whatever happened, it was going to be important.

Ness leaned on the door in an attempt to make out the conversation behind the door, or at least to hear what she was doing.  ('No, no, bad Ness.  This is strictly business!  BUSINESS!') "Huh.  I don't hear anything.  How about you, Paula?"

Paula moved to the door and followed Ness's lead.  "Not a thing.  That's kinda o--"

The door suddenly flew open, and both teenagers fell forward through the doorway.  Standing over them, with the woman in the background, was a large collection of zombies and ghosts, all staring at them malevolently.

"Uh, hi," said Ness nervously.

The lights went out, both in the room and in Ness's mind.

He came to with a splitting headache in the back of his skull.  He was lying on a cold, stone floor, and the air surrounding him was filled with an almost deathly chill.  Opening his eyes didn't reveal much in the way of scenery either -- the ceiling was covered with stalactites, and wherever he was it didn't let much in the way of light in.

Ness sat up, groaning.  Looking around, he saw Paula lying some distance away, just beginning to wake up herself.  He touched the back of his head gingerly and noticed with some consternation that there was a bit of dried blood where whatever he had been hit with had connected.

"Paula, you okay?" he asked.

"Mmm . . . Ness?  Yeah, I'm fine.  My head hurts, but I'm fine."  She sat up and looked towards Ness.  "Where are we?"

"I'm not sure.  The zombies must've taken us here.  Crap, I should've known it was a trap."

Paula shook her head.  "It's all right, Ness.  I'm sure you were only doing what you thought was necessary to help Threed."  She stood up.  "I'm going to see if there's a way out of this place."

Ness watched her, shaking his head.  He'd never met anyone like her -- constantly calm in a crisis, and always so trusting.  He still wasn't sure whether it irritated the heck out of him or absolutely enchanted him.  Either way, she made a great companion.

"It's odd, ya know -- why didn't the Zombies just kill us right there?" he wondered aloud.

"I couldn't say.  Perhaps they're saving us for later . . . or for someone," replied Paula somewhere in the darkness.

Ness shuddered a bit at the idea.  It was pretty cool playing the hero and all, but it'd just recently begun to sink in that there were, in fact, people out there trying to kill him.  He'd never had to deal with that before.  Well, there had been the Sharks, but in that case it wasn't personal, and typically it was more of a maiming than anything else.  Besides, there WERE no more Sharks, now that he'd dealt with their leader.

This was different, though.  He wasn't sure how to take it.

"I found a door!" Paula suddenly shouted, snapping Ness out of his reverie.

"A door?  Great!  Let's go!" he said enthusiastically.

"Wish we could.  It's locked," she reported grimly.

Ness's hopes fell.  "Figures.  Great.  We're stuck down here, and nobody even knows where we are . . ."  It was almost enough to make him cry.

Out of the corner of his eye he made out a movement.  Startled, he looked, only to find it was Paula on her knees, praying.

"Paula, what --" he began, but stopped.  A voice was suddenly playing in his mind -- her voice.

"Hello?  Hello?  I am a friend whom you have never met.  I am Paula, and I am with another friend, Ness . . .  We are trapped somewhere in Threed . . . we're not sure where we are, but you are our only hope for getting out of here
alive . . ."

"Please!"

"Jeff!"
 
 

Chapter 1:  Breaking Out

Deep within the cold, snow-covered country of Winters, a school sat in the middle of the wilderness.  It wasn't a particularly large school, nor a particularly attractive one.  What it lacked in appearance, however, it more than made up for in reputation: this was Snow Wood Boarding School, a place typically reserved for the children of only the richest people.  Many a now famous scientist, doctor and politician could claim the school as their alma mater alongside more prestigious places as Fourside University and Stanvard Academy.

Nestled within the dorms of this school was one of the greatest budding scientific geniuses of all time.  His outward appearance, by itself, did not appear to indicate his intelligence -- short and stout, with shaggy blonde hair, freckles and a button nose.  It was when he was wearing his thick, black-framed glasses that he began to resemble the stereotypical inventor; the only thing that would further add to the image would have been a thick band of masking tape around the bridge.

Jeff Andonuts continued sleeping, still dressed in his school uniform after collapsing on the bed from a late night inventing session.  His best, nay, ONLY friend slept in the bed next to his, his Spanish style black hat hanging from one of the bedposts.  It was odd that the teachers allowed him this minor violation of the dress code, but somehow most of the staff had come to accept this as being part of the boy's character.  He too was in uniform after aiding Jeff in his experiments.

It seemed all was normal.  What neither boy realized at the time was that tonight would mark the beginning of a much greater path for one of them.

<Jeff!>

He shot up, looking around for the source of the strange voice.  Even with his myopic vision, however, he could tell there was not a single soul in the bedroom save for him and Tony.

"A dream," he muttered, settling back into bed.

<Jeff!>

His eyes widened.  He hadn't even been asleep that time.

<I am a friend whom you have never met . . .>

"Well, how do I know you're a friend if I've never --"

<My name is Paula, and I am with another friend, Ness . . .>

"That's nice, but where are --"

<We are trapped somewhere in Threed . . . we're not sure where we are, but you are our only hope for getting out of here alive . . .>

"But how am I supposed to --"

<Please!  Jeff!>

He blinked helplessly as the voice faded from his mind.  Had he just hallucinated the whole thing?  Perhaps this was an indication of one too many late nights.  Or maybe his portable microwave had somehow affected his mind.

And yet . . .

There was an odd little feeling in the back of Jeff's mind that if he ignored this message, the world would suffer.   He couldn't explain it exactly -- it was more of a hunch.  Jeff rarely ignored a hunch; some of his best inventions had come as the result of them.

Sighing, he put on his glasses and got out of bed, careful not to make too much noise.  It wouldn't do to disrupt Tony for something he really didn't need to be involved in.  Jeff was about to break some major school rules, and he wasn't going to drag his friend down with him.  Of course, as usual, things didn't go as planned.

"Jeff?"

He winced.  "Tony, go back to sleep," he whispered.

"But Jeff, where are you going?  It's past curfew!" said the brown-haired boy, still bleary-eyed.

Jeff opened his mouth, prepared to tell Tony he was just going to the bathroom, when he stopped.  It wouldn't be fair to Tony if he lied to him; at any rate, it would worry Tony when Jeff didn't come back.  Jeff was never very good at lying.

"I'm . . . going somewhere, Tony.  It's nothing for you to worry about," he said at last.  He braced himself for a flurry of objections.  Luckily, they never came.

"Really?  Where?  No, don't tell me, I'm sure that it's gotta be real important if you're gonna break school rules like this.  Don't worry, I won't tell anyone.  I'll help you!" offered Tony cheerfully.

Jeff panicked.  This wasn't what he wanted at all.  "Tony, I don't think --"

"Jeff, come on!  You can't do it by yourself.  Lemme help!  Please?"  He gave a look of utmost pleading, and Jeff found he couldn't turn him down.

"Oh . . . okay.  But if we get caught, I'm not letting you take any of the blame.  I'll tell the teachers it was all my fault," Jeff told Tony sternly.

"But Jeff --"

"Don't make me lie to you, Tony.  I can't let you take the blame!  This is something I've got to do myself."

Tony looked at him for a moment.  "All . . . all right.  Come on, let's go!"  Removing his favorite black hat from the bed post, Tony got out of bed, and the two of them began planning Jeff's escape.

The common room outside of Jeff and Tony's room was quiet save for a few sixth years and teachers who were still up discussing the recent unusual sightings seen around the area as of late.  Thankfully, they were too engrossed in their conversations to notice the two young boys quietly sneaking out of their room.

Jeff shifted the bag on his shoulder slightly, and with as much stealth as they could muster they slowly made their way towards the main staircase.  The sounds coming from the rooms suggested that not all of the other students were asleep either.  In one room, it sounded as though somebody were busy wrapping multiple items.

The sound seemed to trigger something in Tony's mind, and he chewed his lip trying to think of it.  Jeff paid him no heed -- the two of them were making their way out quite easily.  All seemed to be going well until, on the first floor . . .

"Oh!  That's right!" Tony suddenly exclaimed.  "You're gonna be missing Garrett's birthday party!  And he was wrapping all those cookies too--"

"Shh!" Jeff hushed him hurriedly, but to no avail.

"Who's there?!" shouted a voice.  The headmaster.

"Sugar!"  Jeff grabbed Tony's arm and quickly yanked him into a room, shutting the door behind him.  The two began to sweat as the sound of footsteps came closer and closer . . .

"Well, you two just gonna stand there at the door, or are you going to say hi?"

Jeff and Tony yelped and spun around.  Professor Maxwell Labs smiled at them benevolently.

"S . . .sir!" Jeff stammered.

A loud knock came from the door.  "Maxwell, you in there?  Open up!"

Maxwell looked at the two boys and made a small motion with his head. Get under the desk.  The two boys, understanding, quickly ducked under just as the headmaster entered.

"Maxwell, did a couple of boys just run in here?" he asked him gruffly.

Maxwell, pretending to be busy with an experiment, replied, "Can't say that I have.  Of course, when I'm really into something like this, the Four Horsemen could run through without me noticing."

The headmaster looked at him suspiciously.  "Are you sure?"

"Of course I am!  Now, if you don't mind, this experiment's sort of risky, and unless you want to wait for another private donation for a lab . . ."

The headmaster's eyes widened.  "Uh, no, no, that's quite all right, Maxwell.  Carry on."  He left the way he came.

When he was certain that the headmaster was out of ear shot, he peeked under the desk.  "Coast's clear."

Jeff and Tony crawled out from under the desk and stood before Maxwell, looking much like a pair of condemned criminals.

Maxwell raised an eyebrow.  "Why the glum faces, boys?  You're in the free and clear now, right?" he said, grinning impishly.

Jeff looked at his professor with a mixture of confusion and hope.  "You're . . . not gonna tell on us?" he asked hesitantly.

Mazwell frowned.  "Now why would I want to do that?  Lord knows I did my share of sneaking out when I was a lad.  A little midnight mischief never hurt anyone, eh?"

It was enough to make Jeff remember why he admired the inventor so much.  It was not just that he was brilliant -- his inventions were the envy of  the scientific community -- but also he had a sense of humor and rebelliousness not often found in teachers at Snow Wood.  Maxwell had often been seen as a bit of a black sheep at Snow Wood; it seemed half his inventions were designed for the purpose of some sort of prank or another.  But Jeff adored him, and in return Maxwell had taken him under his wing, teaching him the ins and outs of the scientific world.

Not like a certain other inventor he knew . . .

Tony was shaking in relief, almost on the verge of tears.  "Thanks, sir, we really owe you one!" he exclaimed.

"Hey, it's no big deal -- just give me something good when you get back, eh?" replied Maxwell, winking.

At this, Jeff suddenly felt an onrush of trepidation and guilt.  "Um, actually . . ."

Maxwell raised both eyebrows this time.  "Something up?"

Jeff gulped and tried to get the words out, but couldn't.  "Well, you see, um..."

Maxwell reached a conclusion before Jeff did.  "Don't tell me you're not coming back," he said, seriously this time.

The young genius shook his head.  "N . . .no, I just . . . don't know when I'll be . . . coming back . . ." he explained timidly.

The look of bemusement dropped from Maxwell's face.  "Look, boys, I know school's hard here sometimes, but running away really isn't --"

"No!  It's nothing like that!" exclaimed Jeff hurriedly.  "It's just . . . something I gotta do!  I can't explain it!  I think it's really important!"  He closed his eyes tightly, waiting for Maxwell to change his mind and send them back upstairs.

The professor stared at Jeff for a moment longer.  "There's nothing I can do to make your change your mind, is there?" he said at last.

"I . . .I'm afraid not, sir," he stammered in reply.

Maxwell turned towards Tony.  "You too, Tony?"

Tony shook his head.  "No sir!  I'm just helping Jeff out!" he replied, somewhat naively.

"Entirely my fault, by the way!  I made him do it!" added Jeff hurriedly, although not entirely convincingly.  "So if you're going to punish anybody, punish . . . punish me!"  He waited for Maxwell's angry response.

" . . .You really shouldn't go out in the cold just dressed in your school uniform.  There's some stuff in the locker room you can use."

Jeff stared at his professor in surprise.  "Then you'll..."

The inventor shrugged.  "I hate to let you go, but you seem to be pretty serious about this. Just take care of yourself, okay?"

The fact of the matter took a moment to wash over the boy, but when it did he grinned broadly.  "Thanks, sir!"

Tony also looked incredibly relieved.  "Yeah, thanks!  Come on, Jeff, let's go!"  The two turned towards the door.

"Wait a sec!" exclaimed Maxwell suddenly.

The two boys turned back fearfully.  "Y . . .yes?" asked Jeff.

Maxwell took a small object out of his lab coat pocket.  "Can't very well get in without one of these, right?" he said, tossing the item to Jeff.  Jeff fumbled with the object for a moment before catching it properly.  It was a key, supposedly, but it was incredibly bent out of shape.

"Sir?  How am I supposed to use this?" he asked.

Maxwell grinned.  "Ah, that's where my latest invention comes into play!" he replied, picking up an odd, thin item.  "This is the 'Machine that Opens Doors, Especially when you Have a Slightly Bad Key.'  Just pop the key into this box and place the narrow end into a lock.  The machine will contort the key to match the lock, and you can use it to open the door.  Handy, except that it makes things a little convenient for thieves . . ." He frowned, then handed the device to Jeff.  "Here you go!"

Jeff attempted to wrap his mouth around the name.  "Couldn't you just call it the 'Bad Key Machine?'" he asked.

Maxwell thought about it for a moment.  "Huh.  Guess you could.  Good work, Jeff."

Jeff nodded, grinning, and turned to leave.

"Oh, and Jeff?"

"Yes sir?"

"Call me if you have problems, you hear?"

"Yes sir.  Thanks sir."

"Anytime.  See you around . . . I guess."

Although Jeff felt a bit guilty about breaking into his classmates' lockers, he knew he was going to need what he found in there more than they would.  At any rate, he intended on returning the stolen items after he finished.  He just hoped they weren't too angry with him about it later.

The Bad Key Machine worked like a charm, and within a few minutes Tony and Jeff had unearthed a Holmes hat, a pop gun and what looked like a discarded and broken air gun.  He didn't feel the need for anything else, but he did grab a thick coat  from his own locker before the duo left the room as it was.

They managed to make their way to the main entrance without incident.  After a quick shock to their systems from the sudden transition of the warm inside to the cold outside, they made their way towards the gates.

As gates went the ones which blocked the entrance to the courtyard of Snow Wood weren't bad; they were imposing, but not too Gothic and not overly elaborate.  Nevertheless, they proved a daunting obstacle for Jeff's great escape.

"Gates're . . . high," he commented dully.

Tony realized immediately what he had to do.  With a newfound resolve, he trudged through the snow up to the gates and got to his hands and knees.

Jeff's eyes widened.  "Tony, what --"

"S-step.  G-get on my back and climb o-over my b-back, 'kay?" replied Tony, shivering.

"Geez, Tony, you're freezing!  You shouldn't --"

"C-come on, J-jeff!  It'll o-only be a q-quick thing," reasoned Tony.

Jeff would've argued further if he hadn't realized that by doing so he was only keeping Tony out here all that much longer.  Nodding, he stepped onto Tony's back, flung his bag over the gate and pulled himself up and over, narrowly missing the spikes which adorned the top.

On the other side, he looked back towards Tony.  Tony grinned, still shivering.  "G-guess I'll be seein' ya, r-right, Jeff?" he said.

Jeff, with a knot in his throat, replied, "Yeah."

"F-friends f-forever?"

"Friends forever."

"G-great!  D-don't forget to w-write f-from wherever y-you're g-going, okay?"

"I won't."

"S-see ya!"  With his arms wrapped tightly around him, Tony headed back for the school.  Jeff watched him, both the school and Tony blocked from his grasp by the wrought-iron gates.

He turned, and didn't look back.

Author's Notes:

After reading some Earthbound paraphernalia (fics, comics, flukes etc.), I began to notice an unsettling trend of people bashing Jeff for being a "geek." I don't understand why it's Jeff that constantly has to be the butt of jokes, but more often than not he is.  Therefore, I thought I'd write a Jeff-centric fic just to try and probe further into Jeff's character (or, at least, what little was provided during the course of the game).

There are, of course, creative liberties.  Anybody who's played the game knows that the incident with the headmaster is non-existent.  Also, it is not until the player actually uses the bent key that Maxwell reveals his invention, as opposed to in the fic where he provides it for Jeff without prior use of the key.  I also excluded the whole cookie stealing thing -- it doesn't really fit my image of Jeff, and at any rate I don't do that anymore.  (Bloody waste of space, six or seven cookies.  I mean
honestly . . .)

Also, those who've read the Fanfiction.net version of this fic may notice some slight differences.  I've been modifying this to take certain things into account -- for example, the presence of the bag.  Also, a minor inaccuracy was fixed regarding the items found in the lockers -- I remembered that it was a broken air gun in the locker, not the spray can (which he has in his possession already at the start of the segment).

Hopefully I'll get chapter two out soon.  Of course, not that anyone cares...