Lights on and Off
Written by Heavily Armored Hamster

A department store
Just a regular place
Things to buy
Things to see
Records and guitars
Robots and elephants
A department store
Just a regular place
...When the lights are on

A department store
Gets to be a scary place
When the lights go off
Then everything gets strange
The items stand up
And start to run amok
The escalators switch
Direction spontaneously
A department store
Is such a scary place
...When the lights are off.

A department store
Is such a scary place
When the lights are off
Records leap off the shelves
Mystical records, running round
Singing all kinds of songs
The meaning of life
The Secret of eternal youth
The Beatles lost, lost sound
Such a sight to see in
A department store
Such a freaky place
...When the lights are off

A department store
Is a really creepy place
When the lights are off
The guitars sprout legs
And mouths, and eyes
And walk at their own pace
They'll sing you a song

A lovely lullaby
Then when you're asleep
They'll smash you til' you die
A department store
Is a dangerous place
...When the lights are off

A department store
Is a horrifying place
When the lights are off
The PA comes on
And murky voice demands
You meet him in his office
With a gwargh or two
Don't know if I can get there
My knees are shaking
I'm only going to visit
A department store
Just a regular place
...When the lights are on