Handsome Tom
Written by Mysterious Submitter 1
To the tune of "Ziggy Stardust" by David Bowie

Tommy Lived in Threed
Hangin 'round with Trick or Treat Kid
Munchin on pumpkin seeds
Had strings on his hands
But took things to far
Became a handsome man
Had friends in garbage cans

Tommy was a jerk
Creepy eyes and crazy hairdo
Like some punk rockin man
He could beat em while smiling
He could leave em to hang
He was so crazy man
Plaid shirt and a purplish tan

So where were the trick kids
When Tom beat up the guys and dolls
Stealin cash, wigs, and tickets
Well he got a helping hand
From his trusty levatating hand
Oh!

Mmmmmm hmm

Tommy wasted time
Tricks 'n' treats 'n' flamin poo poo
The kids were just crass
When he ate black bass
It gave him bad gas
He took it all to far
His mind was in the stars

Tommy had mental problems
Slowly slipping out of his mind
He needed an asylum
When ole' Nessy came to town
He got his punk arse knocked down

Oh yeah!

Ooo-ooooh!

Tommy lived in Threeeeeeeed